Connect
New Chapter... children & family ministry
  • Home
  • Children's Ministry
  • Freebies
  • About
    • Media Kit
  • Contact

Plenty of resources with a dash of humour at Blitz Ministries

12/1/2012

0 Comments

 
Picture
Blitz Ministries is worth checking out. You'll find curriculum for presechoolers, primary aged kids and more, as well as information on FX Live, a high-energy event complete with games, challenges, props and music. There is also information about FamNite Live, a resource that enables you to present a high-octane, family experience in your church yourself.
You'll find, at the Cafe, a printable pdf version of Roger Field's 'The Calling' which would be inspirational to print off and hand out to your children's ministry volunteers and leaders for the start of the year. I've attached it to this blog, but visit Blitz Ministries to check out all the other resources. There is a Humour section on the Cafe page and I've include one article below  titled 'They Know You're the KidMin Pastor because....'
  • The last time you made it to the adult service you tried to do the motions to Amazing Grace.
  • You were banned from the produce aisle of the local grocery store for singing the theme song to Veggie Tales.
  • Your summer begins when VBS ends.
  • Your version of Jesus’ first miracle has Him turning water into Kool Aid.
  • You once gave your spouse the quiet seat prize after dinner.
  • You rolled your eyes when the pastor told the congregation how much the choir members sacrifice to serve God.
  • You are starting to have meaningful conversations with your favorite puppet.
  • In the church foyer everyone runs when they see you coming for fear you’re trying to recruit them.
  • You’re afraid to close your eyes when you pray.
  • When people ask you how many children you have you tell them between 60 and 70.
  • You carry crackers in your pockets.
  • You have a helium tank in your office.
  • Your cracker and juice budget is bigger than your salary.
  • You buy everything in bulk.
  • You honesty believe you are only doing this temporarily until the church finds someone else.
  • You were stunned to learn that some scissors are pointed.
  • You once got stuck in the playground tube at McDonald’s.
  • You scotch-guarded your entire minivan.
  • The children’s workers are taking bets on how long you will last.
  • You once cut up your pajamas to build a flannel graph board.
  • You plan an event for 200 and 50 show up.
  • You plan an event for 50 and 200 show up.
  • You prefer a root canal to meeting with the church board.
  • You know how to pray for healing for dogs, cats and goldfish.
  • The Senior Pastor has forgotten your name.
  • You have forgotten the Senior Pastor’s name.
  • The church janitor won’t speak to you.
  • You understand the terms: tinkle, winkie tink, stinker, and TT
  • You’ve never heard a guest speaker at your church.
  • You went to a four star restaurant and requested animal crackers for dessert.
  • You once sat up straight in the middle of the night and yelled at the top of your lungs, “IS THE BIG SERVICE OUT YET?!!!!”
  • ~

  • calling.pdf
    File Size: 1450 kb
    File Type: pdf
    Download File

    0 Comments



    Leave a Reply.

      get the latest kidmin news
      About me- I'm Anne and I love connecting passionate leaders with quality resources, so they can spend less time on mundane tasks and more time creating eternal impact.
      Join my newsletter
      For Email Newsletters you can trust.
      Picture
      SPONSORS
      Send personalized invitations with Smilebox.
      PicMonkey Photo editing made of win

      Archives

      November 2016
      June 2016
      May 2016
      February 2016
      January 2016
      December 2015
      November 2015
      September 2015
      August 2015
      July 2015
      June 2015
      May 2015
      April 2015
      March 2015
      February 2015
      January 2015
      November 2014
      October 2014
      September 2014
      August 2014
      July 2014
      June 2014
      May 2014
      April 2014
      March 2014
      February 2014
      January 2014
      December 2013
      November 2013
      October 2013
      September 2013
      August 2013
      July 2013
      June 2013
      May 2013
      April 2013
      March 2013
      February 2013
      January 2013
      December 2012
      November 2012
      October 2012
      September 2012
      August 2012
      July 2012
      June 2012
      May 2012
      April 2012
      March 2012
      February 2012
      January 2012
      December 2011
      November 2011
      October 2011
      September 2011
      August 2011
      July 2011
      June 2011
      May 2011
      April 2011
      March 2011
      February 2011
      January 2011
      December 2010
      November 2010

      RSS Feed

      Follow Me on Pinterest
      View my profile on LinkedIn
    New Chapter- packed with information, ideas and resources for family life, faith and ministry.

    Picture
    OUR SERVICES

    Resources
    Apps
    Puppetry
    Freebies
    COMPANY

    About 
    Why
    Disclosure Policy
    SUPPORT

    Contact
    GALLERY